Newtons Flaming Laser Sword?

So i’m sure you’re wondering what the hell Newtons Flaming Laser Sword is, and i’ll tell you just that, but first we need a bit of backstory!

So philosophical concepts have been around about as long as mankind has, we as a species question just about everything in some hope to one day know more, and discover something amazing.

One of the biggest fundamental questions that has ever perplexed us is also quite possibly the simplest.

Why do we exist?

If you start to rack your brain a bit when thinking about the existence of everything, you get back to the big bang theory, and how supposedly super powerful particles collided, bringing everything into existence almost instantly.

For years, we have tried to justify this, and ask how it happened, and what happened before it, but personally i’m more interested in why whatever happened, happened at all.

Forget the explanations, and the Nobel prize for discovering the meaning of life and everything, i want to know why anything exists, not how, why.

Why isn’t the Universe just an endless void of nothingness, expanding into itself forever?

In fact that question in itself shows just how simple minded we humans are. To describe literal nothingness is impossible, because we can’t justify what nothing would be.¬†We envision it as a dark blank space, expanding forever, but in reality, nothingness is something we cannot perceive, darkness is something, a blank space is something, so what is nothing?

A question for another day, as i’m already going off topic VERY quickly.

Anyway, an explanation to the existence of the Universe itself is “Last Thursday-ism”, a belief that the Universe started… last Thursday… and everything that we think we remember was just created with us.

At this point we start to encounter a lot of problems, for example we REMEMBER the past, but is that remembering really something that happened? Are we just remembering a memory that has been created¬†along with us? Surely it would take a lot for every human on earth, and potentially every being in the galaxy to have its memories invented from nothingness instantly? Maybe it would be simpler if it were just your memories…

There are a lot of questions that can be asked at this point, but the main goal of many philosophers is to attempt to disprove it.

This is where “Occam’s Razor” theory comes in handy, as it basically states that given 2 explanations for an event, its safer to go with the simpler one.

For example, if i blow a pencil off a table, is it easier to assume that the pencil moved because i blew it, or because a giant flying Italian food based creature glided into the room, moved the pencil onto the floor, and flew straight out again before i could notice?

Thats essentially what Occam’s Razor is helpful for.

Last Thursday-ism becomes a problem at this point, because however hard it is to believe, it is a far simpler explanation for the creation of the Universe than we can provide, let alone prove.

However it’s annoyingly simple how this theory is blatantly untrue, yet completely impossible to disprove.


This is where Newtons Flaming Laser Sword theory comes into play, it basically states that “common sense says no”, and therefore the idea that the Universe was created 5 seconds ago, or a week ago, or a few hours ago is wrong, because even though we cannot disprove it, we know that we experienced past events, and nobody can tell us otherwise.

As usual with Philosophy, a lot more questions were asked than were answered in this post, so look forward to more posts on:

  • What is True Nothingness?
  • Solipsism
  • The Truth About Deities
  • More Explanations For Our existence

Thanks for listening to me ramble, i hope you enjoyed learning a little something about how bad ass Newton apparently could be!

Now i want my own Flaming Laser Sword…



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